What a fucking waste of my time that was.
Directors: Paul Tibbitt
Mike Mitchel
Writers: Glenn Berger (Screenplay)
Jonathan Aibel (Screenplay)
Stephen Hillenberg (Story)
Paul Tibbitt (Story)
I don't like Spongebob. Correction: I used to like Spongebob, I liked the first few series and the first film but after that the show was dying and it was it just...it's dead and scary and I can't stand it. I remember the ads for this movie though and honestly, I thought Spongebob had finished its television life and was going to be going out with a bang with this film that seemed to take place, mostly, on land. How wrong I was...
This film takes it sweet time getting to the surface, about an hour into the film to give a more general time. That's only half an hour for land time. Why market it as mostly land time when it's actually just the third act? And even that's not even all that great, I mean, the CGI looks really fake but it's got this feel to it that makes it believable in the surface world which definitely makes it work. There's a point in which they have to become super hero's which, going into the film, is what I thought this was going to be about. Apparently not. But this superhero section has one of the worst character designs I've ever seen. Plankton has the biggest, most muscular body out of all the characters and yet...his head stays the same size it was before he changed...it looks horrific. He literally looks like a huge body builder with a pretty long nipple for a head. It's disgusting to look at.
Speaking of disgusting, There is a squence where Plankton goes into Spongebob's brain and we get to see what that's like and I can't deal with it. It's sickeningly sweet. So sickening that it makes Plankton vomit, the vomit becomes a rainbow with eyes that calls Plankton daddy making Plankton scream in terror and rightfully so. It's disgusting. There's also a Shining parody which all the kids will get y'know.
Another thing they manage to parody that kids will understand is the bit about teamwork. Spongebob is trying to get Plankton to say teamwork rather than te-am-work and it plays out exactly how the "cool whip" bit from Family Guy does. I don't know if that was thrown in there for the adults but it wasn't even funny when Family Guy did it so why would it be funny coming from Spongebob?
I complain about this film but it's actually ok, it's better than what the series is now which is just terrible so that's a blessing. The CGI is actually pretty good, or at least it looks good and fits with the film. You can still tell that it's CGI but not as much as you can in some other films where it looks terrible so...thank God for small mercies right?
The voice acting isn't all that terrible either, especially with the seagulls who have really good voices behind them such as, Billy West who you may know as a voice actor from Futurama, Cree Summer from a lot of reboots of great cartoons, Tim Conway and more. The live action acting from Antonio Banderas was also fun to watch, painful to listen to hear him try to sound like a pirate, but fun to watch.
I'm sorry if this seems a little rushed but I have no idea what to even say about this. It was adequate and the story revolved around teamwork and how much they could hammer in the fact that if you work as a team everything's better, unless one person fucks up, then it's just that one person's fault and nothing to do with the team. Probably a really harmful message to send out to kids but the films out there and kids love Spongebob so...that's that generation of kids not taking their part of the blame for something. Like I said, I'm sorry it's rushed but I hope you enjoyed it. Peace out guys,
This is just my opinion and if you disagree then that's great, I'm open to discussion and I'm always interested to hear how you feel about this film. This is also a critique which is considered "Fair Use" under the Copyright Act 1976. If you like this film then go and support its creators by buying the DVD or Bluray.
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